Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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