Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
