i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
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