would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
