We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
