Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
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We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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