when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
