hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
