This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
