She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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