She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
