On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
