What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
