**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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