just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I want a musical about memes.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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