I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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