Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
