Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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