I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize