So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Randomize
