what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Randomize
