Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
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Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.