we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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