let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
