I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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