It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
