Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
