Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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