on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
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i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
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I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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