Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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