We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
