Porn is love you can see.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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