I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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