brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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