Dual....:-)
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize