I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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