new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
