One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
