This girl is more easily done than said...
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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