She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize
