so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize