Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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