If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
