Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
