O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
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Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
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When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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