used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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