If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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