A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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