her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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