oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
