Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
