Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
please come you make the beer taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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